"How did you know to do that Lois?  Did your school have a Crisis Plan?"

 

"And so we are not a lighthearted Mediterranean people.  We're Lutherans, even the Catholics are.  And though one doesn't like to generalize about Lutherans, one thing is most certainly true of every last one of them..."

"I know this may sound a bit strange, but the tip and pad area of your finger is a 'privileged area' of your body, one of the few areas I cannot treat but one for which I must refer you to a specialist."

"Anyway, the...thing that Gary has done 'this time.' It sounds pretty serious, and I was wondering if you could tell me... Well, why didn't I just suspend him from school immediately instead of taking Outdoor Ed away from him next week?"

Parenting.